Michele Attias Life Coach

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Don’t Chase Success, Aim For Excellence

A fortnight ago I received one of the most incredible proposals I have had so far.

It was from a producer at Universal Studios in Los Angeles. He wanted to discuss an article I had written about divorce a few years ago. That particular article had been floating around on various writing platforms online until it was picked up by them.

They were intrigued by the person who had written it and wanted to find out more about me.

We scheduled a meeting to speak further via Skype. It felt strange to be sitting in my living room in London on a cold winters night speaking to to their Production Manager who was basking in the afternoon sunshine in Los Angeles.

The moment was totally surreal.

Their proposal although attractive and potentially lucrative, was not something I was willing to consider, but could have had the potential to catapult me into a global platform and make me very successful.

It did however bring about a number of important learnings from the whole process.

When writing the article, I wasn’t really aware about whether I was targeting a niche, or if people would be impressed. I wrote from my heart with zero expectation, and had no idea it would be picked up by Universal Studios a number of years later.

I simply wrote using a combination of authenticity, perseverance and patience.

It irks me when I consistently see adverts and promotions as a way of making a quick buck. Earning six and seven figures in a short space of time seems to be the way to do things these days and I find the sense of real value seems to have evaporated into thin air.

It seems as if people want to pick up Willy Wonka’s magic ticket to success. In more recent times Justin Bieber, whose Youtube video catapulted him to success when it went viral in a very short period of time.

In the old days we had Artisans and Apprentices who spent years mastering a craft.

They learnt from the leaders in that field and then went out into the world practicing consistently as they mastered their art whilst building their tree of knowledge.

This is so unlike the urgency that I see today, where people are incapable of slowing down and navigating the process of pain, rejection and failure. They want to surpass this by doing things fast, getting to their destination on the fastest ticket there is.

We are bombarded by constant messages on social media telling us we can write a book in 5 days, set up a 6 figure coaching practice in a fortnight and run an online business with a 6 figure income within the first month. Financial freedom beckons and this financial freedom ticket will eliminate worries and propel us into the life we dream about.

The destination beckons, but no one wants to endure the often treacherous journey.

I see it constantly in my clients and prospects. They want to create a business, fast. They want to find their life purpose double quick. They want to find their niche now. They want to surpass the agony of being patient and waiting.

It seems we have to know it all and we have to achieve it all now.

Today.

The anxiety that so many are plagued with can’t be tolerated therefore there is an attempt to vacate this uncomfortable feeling brewing inside. Anything but slow down and listen to what the one next step needs to be and the one purpose is for today (not for your entire life) just today.

The reality is that those who slowly but surely spend years building and perfecting their craft out of devotion stand out. Their message is consistent, contains value and it shows they have identified their own overwhelming sense of uncertainty and anxiety. They made mistakes, fell flat on their face at times, but they kept going.

They mastered their strengths and this shows in every fibre of their being.

The main ingredient to achieving success is a commitment that you will do what ever you set out to do however long it takes. I’m aware that this can waiver if there is a lack of belief in capability. At times it feels like the treacherous journey we watched the Hobbit undertake is what we are currently experiencing.

We imagine there are metaphorical dragons, elves, dwarves, sorcerers, but there are also wizards and there is also magic.

Yet we have to create the magic as we navigate this journey.

The artist Vincent Van Gogh spent years learning his art, copying the masters and perfecting his brush strokes. His art changed direction a number of times. He explored and tested different portraits as well as painting on different textures of canvas. He lived in different places to try out the ambience on his painting style. As time went on he began to develop his own artistic flair.

He didn’t become an artist in a year with a 7 figure salary. He spent years developing as a way of making a difference in the world, and we can learn so much from this.

Before he died, Van Gogh wrote to his brother Theo stating the following;

Man is not on Earth merely to be happy, nor even simply to be honest. He is here to realize great things for humanity. To attain nobility and to surmount the vulgarity. Art is long and life is short and we must wait patiently.

Everything that is created has a process of slowly filtering through, therefore the results are not immediate. That’s not to say that it isn’t been registered and noticed, and that the people you would like to attract aren’t noticing or acknowledging you, they are simply building a relationship of trust and this takes time.

If individuals spent less time chasing the dream, and more time listening to what they really want. Listening to where their strengths lie and how they can make even the smallest impact in the world, they would be far more satisfied than behaving like an Olympic runner chasing the never ending finishing line of success.

The route to this is to take success out of the equation. In this way we focus on serving, on speaking our truth, on making a difference and as we do this and find our authentic platform.

Before we know it, success lands on our shoulder like a butterfly trying to arouse our attention.

The Psychologist Victor Frankl who wrote the life changing book ‘Man’s Search for Meaning’ and who spent years in Auschwitz concentration camp stated:

Don’t aim at success. The more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued. It must ensue and it only does so as the unintended side effect of ones dedication to a cause greater than oneself.

You have to let it happen by not caring about it and you will see that in the long run, success will follow you precisely because you had forgotten to think about it.

Slow down and turn off the outside noise. Turn inwards and discover what you want, what difference you can make (however small) and how you would like to serve your audience and your tribe.

In fact, care so much about what you want to communicate, that you really don’t care about impressing, convincing or cajoling anyone. Do it with authenticity, intention, care and love.

Categories
Coaching
Lifestyle
Self Development
Tags
Lifestyle Coaching; business coaching; personal development; personal growth;